Many of my and Colter's initial fears around having a threesome were generally about it changing our relationship. We were happy in our relationship as it was. We thought of it as something precious that needed to be protected.
One night we were up late having a smoke sesh and talking about random things. Colter mentioned a concept I will probably always remember. The idea that I love you no matter what. Couples say that, but they don't mean it. There is one painfully obvious thing that can end almost any relationship.
Fucking someone else.
Most people's commitment to one another is hugely based on the promise to wall off your sexuality, which led to the idea that if you removed that threat to your relationship, how much stronger would the two of you be?
It's a freeing idea, but in practice, it takes a lot of just that. Practice. It took us a while to build up to having a threesome and getting to that level. At first, the idea of the act itself didn't turn me on. At first, what would turn me on about it was that it turned on Colter.
I was doing something he thought was hot. He would get so horny when we would play.
So how was it after we had our first threesome?
That night we went home and fucked like horny teenagers. It was so hot and passionate. I loved it. So did Colter.
The next day I questioned if I enjoyed it. I think I subconsciously felt guilt. I was worried that Colter would think differently of me. These feelings are, of course, uncomfortable.
I found that given a bit of time, those feelings melt away. They aren't based in reality. Not for our relationship, at least. If anything, it brought us closer together. It wasn't a dividing force; it was one more thing we were doing together as a couple.
We have had experiences that didn't go exactly as we wanted. Those situations always drum up uncomfortable feelings. It's easy to let those feelings cause you to question if being open is worth it. The only advice I can give is not to give power to negative emotions.
Notice them, and let them be. You have to be able to talk to your significant other. Always come from a place of putting your partner first. Doing that can eliminate the threat of crossing lines.
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